Lois Martin-Walls has become a key source for email that makes you giggle. Here are excerpts from one she sent called "Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?" Dr Phil would say: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on THIS side of the road before it goes after the problem on the OTHER SIDE of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his CURRENT problems before adding NEW problems.
Oprah Winfrey would say: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
George Bush had this view: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us or for us. There is no middle ground here.
Anderson Cooper (CNN) offered this interpretation: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.
John Kerry offered this: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
Ernest Hemingway said: To die in the rain. Alone.
Grandpa's opinion was: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
Colonel Sanders had this question: I missed one?
Vice President Cheney asked: Where's my gun?
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